The Garo Sero Institute has just revealed a sincere entry of the diary written by the actress Kim Sae-Sign to his deceased friend Moonbin (Astro), revealing him for the first time to the public. Although dated April 27, 2023, its contents remained unknown so far and are deeply moving the public to Korea.
The entry of Kim Sae-Sore captures his pain, regret and emotional turbulence following the tragic passage of Moonbin. The two have been friends for 18 years, having grown up in the entertainment sector from childhood.
“I was so exhausted, I thought of ending my life … and at that moment, I heard the news about you”, He wrote. “That day, for some reason, I really wanted to see you. I was about to call you, but I didn’t do it. Now I regret it.”
Dentelioni: a silent tribute
Fans quickly noticed emotional symbolism in his words. Moonbin’s final post on X (previously Twitter) presented a photo of a lion tooth, a symbol of fleeting life and silent goodbyes. In a silent tribute, Kim Sae-Ron had also set a lion tooth as a photo of his Instagram profile, creating an unspoken connection between the two friends even after his disappearance.
In his diary, Kim Sae-Ram reflects on his struggles with mental health and how deeply he connects to Moonbin’s silent pain. “We kept pretending to feel good … just not to worry about anyone”, He confessed.
Astro’s pain and a sense of responsibility
The entrance also reveals the pain of the members of Astro and how to assist their pain affected Kim Sae-Se. It describes the new maturity of Sanha, the emotional breakage of CHA Eun-Woo and the peaceful pain transported by each member.
“San-he said he would protect me … and he really became an adult”, He wrote. “Seeing Jin-Woo who tried to smile, Myung-Jun Hyung holding him inside, Dong-min breaks and Min-Hyuk remains strong … he broke my heart.”
She admitted that she too had thought of ending her life, but in the end she postponed the decision, even if only for a while, for love and responsibility for those who surrounded them.
A final farewell
“Sleep well, bid. Wherever you go, the road will shine. I love you. I’ll wait for you.”
Through this rough and touching entrance, the Kim Sae-Sew diary opens a rare and intimate window on the hidden pain that even the celebrities often bring silently. It also serves as a painful reminder of the urgent need to take care of mental health, especially in the high pressure world of Korean entertainment.
Complete translation of the letter Kim Sae-Sign sent to Moon Bin
April 27, 2023
I’m writing a new page in my diary.
Bin, I miss you so much … I don’t even know where to start or what to say.There were times when I was so exhausted, I thought of ending my life.
And in the midst of this, I heard about you …
More than anyone else, I understand how heavy and lonely that decision has been.
So I couldn’t take me to ask you, “why?” I couldn’t really.But do you know? That day … for some reason, I really wanted to see you.
I was about to call you, but I didn’t.
Now I regret it.
Maybe I couldn’t stop you, but if only …
If only I could have held you for another day, only another day …If I arrive today, tomorrow will arrive.
I kept telling me that, to survive, to overcome every day.
Could you do it too?My emotions have been everywhere.
There were times when I thought: “I should just follow you …”
Every day, every moment seems trembling.
I was so tired …
That I couldn’t keep you more, I couldn’t be with you more.Don’t be alone, okay?
If you ever feel alone, come and visit me in my dreams.
So, I sit next to you and listen to everything, as you did for me.We have been together for so long.
You, Chanhee … everyone felt a family for me, always there as if it were the most natural thing.
I felt relieved seeing the debut of Astro and received so much love.But then I thought: I need to protect his and other members.
So … I decided to delay my ending, just for a while longer.Sanha said he would protect me.
It was what I worried about most: our youngest.
And now he has grown up in such a mature adult.Then…
Jin-Woo tries to smile through it,
Myung-Jun Hyung,
Dong-mintus has broken,
Min-hyuk remains strong …
Seeing them like this … my heart shattered.Why did you have to be you?
This sadness, this pain … is it already too much for me to bear – why did he have to take you too?I want to grieuating you freely,
I want to talk about you, remember you …
But I’m afraid – Fear that my existence may somehow hurt you or contaminate your departure.
Even now … I’m still afraid.My brother, my friend, our bin …
We have crossed so much since we were young.
I thought we had finally realized our dreams and that things would be fine.But I – The version of me was blocked and unable to move forward,
Be buried in vague accusations from the media and the sector …
I could not satisfy everyone’s expectations and in the end I also disappointed myself.I chose this life, this career, so I have to take responsibility.
My family looks at me alone. So do my fans.
But I know … you must have heard the same.
Right?When we make our dreams come true, pain also arrives.
And be someone who cannot talk about it, who keeps everything empty inside –
I wasn’t just me, right?We passed every day so together …
If only us – only once – could have completely open ourselves,
our hearts shouted together.If only I had told you: “I’m so tired …”
Even now, I have not been able to say it.
If only I had put all of us together and I left everything …We didn’t want to worry about anyone,
So we continued to behave strong, pretending to be fine. Right?Sleep well, bin.
Wherever you go, the path that will shine.
I respect and support everything you are.
You were the most surprising person.I’m sorry I haven’t managed to tell you more often,
Sorry if I haven’t hugged you longer.I love you, bid.
See you soon … I’ll wait for you 🙂– Your younger sister, your 18 -year -old friend –
Kim Sae-Sore and Moonbin shared a close link, both having part of the Fantagio agency. They starred on the 2015 web drama “to continue”, which introduced the Astro members before their official debut.
While the letter now heads for the public, many fans have expressed both the pain and for its words, for their friendship and for a truth finally listened to.
